Support For England

07/03/2006

Whilst sweltering in 25 degrees and wearing comfortable khaki shorts, surveying some of the rough grass that is due to be topped, news comes to Glen Trollaigh via number one daughter’s mobile phone from Wimbledon’s centre court that Andy Murray has been whipped by some dago in the last sixteen. I suffer a bit of a reality check, as in this fantastic weather I really could not give a toss about Wimbledon. It must have been when girls stopped wearing tennis dresses that I lost interest, but now that major stars wear their hats on back to front and conduct their post match interviews in a tongue that cannot be heard or understood, I fail to grasp what it is all about. As for the ghastly grunting and whinging that accompanies every shot, I am glad to be out of it.

I am worried by the headlines that shout out “Racism” when some red and white clad chap is knocked over outside a Stonehaven pub.  In the unlikely event that this is anything more than a drunken assault, at the very most it may be “Nationalism”, for despite our multicultural society, I am certain that even President Blair looks on Great Britain as one race. While the police chiefs jostle for media position and weak and corrupt politicians wring their hands, it would be well to remember that absolutely any violence connected to football is “Hooliganism”. Which we have a raft of laws and regulations to control, let us all hope that our Mickey Mouse police force can summon the balls to do something about hooliganism, together with all forms of violence. Against which they seem to be protecting themselves rather than any law abiding citizen, let us hope that even more legislation will not restrict our liberties and that the law will come down hard on all criminals.

Yours Aye, Archie, The Baron Trollaigh.