Different Derby Day

06/06/2006

The mercury continues to climb to 20 degrees and the Landward long range forecast indicates high pressure with weak fronts nudging the west coast throughout the coming weekend. I know that this will be good news for the Glen Orchy Kerr’s with their Irish wedding on the 10th, however I do hear that extra suitcases are being filled with outfits for every possible happenchance, although the head of the house has been proclaiming that he is taking his kilt and a couple of clean shirts. I should warn him that a kilt is like a red rag to a bull at any Irish border crossing and risky body searches are almost inevitable.

Here in Glen Trollaigh we are recovering from a hetic weekend looking after our EU Greek Tobacco Farming Advisor, rather than a trip to Epsom, however such sprees are rather frowned on by dearest Dottie, so it was smilies all round in support of tobbacco subsidies.The Greek Advisor launched into the life of the north Argyll glens energetically. She quickly picked up the trick of spoiling the dogs and flattering her host and followed up with wild appreciation of our kilted ghillies, shunned only a few weeks ago by the London Stylists. Fishing, shooting and hillwalking around the glen ridges were all attacked at breakneck speed, with the ghillies almost fainting with effort then grovelling with gratitude at the EU sized tips and bottles of Ouzo, I dread to think of the ghillies’ health on Sunday morning. The dear girl admitted to inviting a few people for Sunday lunch, our hospitality was stretched to the limit by freeloading MSPs, The Greek Ambassador and curiously the Catholic Bishop of Argyll and The Isles. Even Ross Finnie, a man seldom photographed without a knife and fork in his hands, appeared for a few seconds “opportunity”. Nana had warned us all on pain of death not to mention Tobacco, as we had to have the subsidy cheque in the bank before SERRAD twigged what we are up to. Alas, it was over all too soon and Tanya’s Taxis swept the Greek Advisor away in the failing light of a beautiful summer’s evening, carrying with her the remaining MSP hangers-on. Nana’s parting advice was that we should be appointing a Glen Trollaigh Heritage Manager and that funds for a feasibility study would be on their way first thing Monday. Apparently, we have to advertise the EU funded post; however, Nana indicated that we could “keep it in the Glen” as long as we remembered to follow all the conventions on Equal Opportunities, New Deal Applicants and all those challenged in any other way. Now, where is my CV, yours aye, Archie, The Baron Trollaigh.