Blood Sucking Trollaighs

07/26/2008

The North Argyll Glens now experience their summer, basically warm and wet, with visitors and weeds in abundance. The family all refer to this school holiday period as “The Stretch” between our insect free spring of long daylight and September when one may once more pit one’s wits against the wildlife, gun or rod in hand, and at dusk be sure of a dram by the fire in good company. Of course one can escape the guests, grass cutting, traffic and multi A82 traffic lights with a little skilful fly fishing; however the main thought on the post Wimbledon morning dog walk is the bizarre wish for the summer to be over. Of course it is very different for families and idle politicos who still relish their summer hols at Salcombe without a single midge on the deck patio, or those lucky enough to have the use of that isolated holiday home where brats still wander unshod over Hebridean sand, skin itchy with honest wind blown salt. However, apart from the odd race meeting I prefer to stay at home in the summer and mutter at the midges chewing through the glass of the Great Windows of Trollaigh, the blighters sometimes make all my outdoor tasks unbearable. Perhaps I should face up to preparing my tax return or the updating of maintenance schedules and remember the magical summer holidays of my own youth, rather than grump about the discomfort of this season. Perhaps the provision of a gaggle of grandchildren would let me rekindle the love of high summer out of doors, time will tell.

With the publication date upon us and the embargo on profit spoiling comment lifted, I may now praise the new work “Pigmentation of Culicoides Impunctatus.” Written by one Prof S. Beard PhD. My lips have been sealed for some months as the good Prof wanders unhindered the length and breadth of Glen Trollaigh, ever since some bally rambler was bitten by a black midge. As a true conservationist the black beggar was bottled up and sent off to The Royal Society, who in turn commissioned Prof S Beard PhD to look into the matter. The Prof turned out to be an interesting cove and took easily to an Ardbeg and a chat about midgie mandibles on his way out of Glen Trollaigh each night. I was delighted to learn that the “black one” is indeed unique and further more the Prof had sent off his papers suggesting the sub-genus name: “Trollaigh Black”. It will come as no surprise to regular readers that this was laughed out of court by the wets because of the offensive colour reference and to his eternal credit the Prof flatly turned down the recommended “Dappled Beard”. After much time wasted by the port swilling classes, a compromise “The Slightly Darker Trollaigh” has been accepted. To hell with all honours and gongs, to have an invasive, blood sucking insect carrying your name is the tops! Yours Aye, Archie, The Baron Trollaigh. 

With to-day as the publication date, any embargo is lifted and I can reveal some wonderful news about our very own natural history “first”.